a little context

Not that I always, oh, well all right, not that I ever do it, but I know that in highly charged situations with one’s children, it is always a good idea to examine one’s own emotional terrain before engaging with them in theirs.  To wit, I grew up in a house in which half empty vodka bottles, some stashed in hiding places, some in plain sight in the liquor cabinet with a tell-tale loosened, carelessly returned cap, figured mightily. 

That may have had just a little to do with my obsessive organizing of the pantry, dontchathink?


2 thoughts on “a little context

  1. I saw the first pic, I saw the second, I got confused (“Wait, it was that his bathroom was messy? I thought it was that he was drinking.”)
    My gut reaction was that I’d broach the subject with my kid. IMMEDIATELY. Because drinking alone — drinking vodka alone — is not healthy behavior, in my book. Especially at nineteen. This would require speedy “nipping in the bud.” (I grew up in an alcoholic household, too; but in my case, there was no hiding of bottles, it was right out there, every day.)
    Then I checked in with my sanity (aka, the Consort). “What would you do if…” I asked. He, being the diplomat that he is, said that he would keep an eye on things, and bring up the subject if/when the kid’s behavior became erratic.
    “But drinking vodka alone is dangerous! And a whole bottle in just a week or so?!” But, see, I was making assumptions. Maybe, the Consort mentioned, the bottle was packed up almost empty. Maybe the contents had been poured down the sink. If I approached the situation without having all the information, it would only create tension. And even if there was an issue with the drinking, people are very good at convincing themselves they don’t have a problem. Unless you point out the problem (drinking too much) while they’re experiencing the problem (acting inebriated).
    “So, you wouldn’t say anything just yet?”
    “You’d just keep an eye open and watch things?”
    Like a hawk.
    I wouldn’t be sleeping well, though. I’ll keep you company in the wee hours, Anna. 🙂

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